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How can I deal with my in-laws?

baby smiling to her parents and grandparents

We know that when that little one arrives, it will be a source of pure excitement and joy for your family. But during pregnancy, it’s important to set boundaries with grandparents and in-laws. Everyone will have different opinions and think they’re the experts in raising babies. It can be quite overwhelming!

Setting clear rules with your own parents might be a bit easier, but dealing with the in-laws can be a bit more complicated. It’s important to try to be careful not to hurt their feelings or make them feel excluded, but you can’t put that before your wellbeing or peace of mind. So how can you strike a balance?


First, agree with your partner on how to handle the relatives’ opinions and how involved you want them to be in the baby’s life. The most important thing is to reach an agreement where everyone is happy. Your parents and in-laws want the best for the baby, and will bombard you with advice that worked for them ages ago. But remember, times change and there are new tricks for everything! Appreciate their intentions, but be clear about boundaries. You can’t make everyone happy!

If something doesn’t sit right with you, here are some tips:

  • Tell them you follow the doctor’s advice. They might accept that more easily!
  • Be firm in your position and don’t feel obligated to convince them. You know what you’re doing.
  • If they cross the line, calmly let them know that it bothered you. Expressing your feelings can help you set boundaries too.
  • Ignore annoying and unpleasant comments! It’s not worth getting into a full-blown battle.
  • If you can avoid it, don’t tell them their advice is unwelcome; there’s no need to create tensions.

Everyone is excited about the baby’s arrival, especially the future grandparents! It’s great that they want to help and care for the little one. We encourage you to include them in your support team and establish the dynamic that works best for you, your partner, your baby, and them!

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